LONG LIVE THE OCCUPATION

1

I went down to the Occupation

To take my fair share of abuse

And help us out from our prostration

To politicians and their ruse

Of better living through our voting.

(And all the while, of course, they’re gloating.

They know our votes are now worth less

But sometimes help, relieving stress.)

I took their clubs, endured their beating;

But slowly they forced our retreat

But mostly cause we had to eat.

One thing’s for certain: no more pleading.

And when at night I hit the sack

I know that soon we will be back!

2

If this seems like a contradiction,

Believe me when I say it’s true.

You might give way to interdiction

When leadership’s been knocked askew;

But slowly we will reassemble

And thinking how to make them tremble,

We’ll finally beat back their deceit,

The stock and trade that is Wall Street.

The point is we set people thinking

On how America is run,

And forced the Street to 911.

So fewer now will be lipsyncing

What Wall Street’s pols say. We’re content:

We are the 99%.

EVEN 1% OF THE 99

I don’t know why I get depressive

When listening to the GOP.

Is it because they are oppressive?

Would see me under lock and key?

The Democrats, too, have Obama

Who’s really helped them shape our trauma.

So what am I supposed to do?

Just sit at home while feeling blue?

What happened to the Occupation?

Where is the 99%?

Too busy scrounging to pay rent

To stand up to our degradation?

If 1% of 99

Would stand, they’d stop at our frown line.

CHRISTIAN RELIGION AT THE BALLOT BOX

When voting in a Christian nation,

The Holy Bible is our guide;

Because it was God’s declaration

That celebrated genocide:

So killing natives and black slavery

Were never forms of Christian knavery;

That foreign lands and cussed gays
Must suffer us till end of days.

It gave men rights to women’s stoning

If whorish women had a yen

To “do it” with a man or men,

The price for their illicit boning.

As Christian voters under God,

Our prospects need the Bible’s nod.

IDIOT AMERICA 1

Here dinosaurs are wearing saddles

Because the Bible tells us so;

And women are a man’s first chattels;

Blacks still should suffer from Jim Crow.

When these “deductions” from the Bible,

Writ when we humans were still tribal,

Are still believed by people here

It shows their minds have stripped a gear.

And, too, because the politicians,

In their relentless search for votes,

Will pander to what floats their boats.

In fact, encourage dispositions

Where cranks are puffed with self-esteem

And imbeciles are now mainstream.

PASSOVER

“I do not have the slightest feeling,”

Said Randall Terry*, “for men who,

Instead of practicing their healing,

Kill babes.  Operation Rescue

Demands an end to this atrocity.

We do not kill with animosity

But do it with profoundest love

Commanded by our God above.”

When this was brought to God’s attention,

He asked when He’d made manifest

That Randall Terry was so blessed

“That he can make known My intention?

I’ve killed some babies in My time.

Who claims Passover was a crime?”

* Randall Terry founded the “pro-life” organization Operation Rescue.

MODERN POETRY

I woke up with an armadillo

Was snoring soundly in my bed;

Then I recalled, beneath my pillow,

My .45 and shot it dead.

This roused the peasants in the village

Where I’d been helping with their tillage.

They, seizing me, brought me to court

And asked me just what kind of sport

Would do a thing like that. I answered

And what would you do if you knew?

They scratched their heads. They had no clue.

I said because their heads were cancered,

They thought that words should make some sense.

Now go set up the circus tents.

HEAVEN OR HELL? (FOR ANNMARIE)

I want to take a trip to Heaven

But only in my mind to see

If Heaven's better than the 7-

Eleven or filed with ennui.

And then I’d visit with the devil

To see if Hell is on the level:

Will I be punished for the sin

Of giving all the boys my yin?

I closed my eyes and concentrated

And tried to see what my mind showed

But saw a number, my zip code.

I saw its meaning as it faded:

It meant that Heaven’s Hell’s on earth

So go and get your money’s worth.

A BRIEF BIOGRAPHY OF A PORN STAR

I used to be a girl, immodest

In everything I said and did;

And thought that I was just the hottest.

I know now it was just my id

That made me think that I was cuter

Could get away with acting lewder

Than any girl. Showed camel toe

But really all it was for show.

But couldn’t change. As I got older

I thought I could put this to use

So did a film. It cooked my goose;

And I was hooked, played fast and loose.

And suddenly a star was born.

I make a fortune doing porn.

FOR TAMARA AT FAMILY FRIEND POEMS.COM

It’s funny how he makes me giggle

When I find that his finger’s in

To probe the spot that makes me wiggle

So that my pussy wants to sin.

I want his cock to take my pussy

Because he is a glamourpuss. He

Once asked could he fuck my ass.

I asked about the shit morass

That if he did he might encounter.

An enema was what he said

He’d used once on his sister’s spread. 

And thinking this, I saw him mount her

And pump away at her butt hole;  

And hoped they used the birth control.

MARGIN CALL

The Newt will give Social Security

To anyone who asks for it,

Providing they don’t lack the purity

Of sacrifice to take a hit.                          

So all your work is beneficial,

You still might end up sacrificial

Because free markets don’t protect

From bankers’ greed and its effect.

And savings always means the bankers

Whom we must give our money to

And hope deposits don’t skidoo.

For banks, like ships, will weigh their anchors

When payouts that they can’t afford

Will sink them if you get on-board.

PSYCHOTICS IN THE WHITE HOUSE

I never got enough affection

When I was just a little boy;

And had to make my own protection

The object of my pride and joy.

At school, when I got ganged or bullied

I saddled up, got wild and woolied;

And when those fuckers turned their backs

That’s when I gave them 40 whacks.

This may not seem to be essential

But shows I’ll never back away

Before I make offenders pay.

It comes with being presidential.

As you can see, from when a kid

I’ve always led off with my id.

THE CHINESE PEACE PRIZE (FOR WAR AND HUMAN RIGHTS ABUSES)

The Chinese are self-advertisers,

And money men, so you’ll believe

Me when I say they’re subsidizers                      

Of anything that will deceive:

Like giving Russia’s Mr. Putin,

A far worse man than was Rasputin,

Their Peace Prize for pursuing war

Against the Chechens, gone hard-core;

And countless human rights abuses.

For what the Chinese want to do

In rendering their dream come true

Is show that torture has its uses;

And show the world it must succumb

To torture as a rule of thumb.

POEMS ARE MEANT TO “TAKE THE TOP OF YOUR HEAD OFF”

I try to write with vim and vigor

And say what’s really on my mind;

And do it with a kind of rigor

But bounded by how I’m confined:

By lines are measured out in syllables

That rhyme as well. They can be thrillables

As only rhyme and verse can do

While prose displays a dull IQ.

I wouldn’t have you think I’m snobby.

But poetry was meant for verse

Invented as it was to curse,

When Simmonides, Hammurabi

Of poets, first laid down the law

That poems work like a power saw.

MEMO FROM WALL STREET

We must establish our position

On all of OWS

Because we need the ammunition

To stop these students’ full court press

Against the money that we’re making

Which they claim’s stealing, merely taking.

We wouldn’t want the GOP

To get so scared they cut us free.

Let’s claim that when they knock free markets

They’re killing off democracy

In favor of autocracy.

Then we’ll paint them with that black mark. It’s

Our inerrant ace in the hole

So we don’t have to show control.

HEAVEN CAN WAIT

1

I met a girl, a glamourpuss,

Who questioned me on watching porn;

I said I had an omnibus

That we could watch from night to morn.

And so we settled in to watching

A crew of men who were debauching

A creature very like a sylph.

I said that I preferred a milf.

She said, “Then, sir, your wish is granted.”

And when I looked a woman who

Sat next to me in my church pew

Appeared before me. “I’m enchanted,”

She said. “Sent down by Jesus Rex

As my reward. So let’s have sex.”

2

I said, “My God. Sent down by Jesus!”

“Well . . . yes,” she said. “He won the war

In Heaven’s realm. And so, to please us,

He sent us down so we could score.”

“By watching porn?” I asked. “No, silly.

By learning how to guild a lily.

The porn I thought to watch with you

Will teach me what I need to do.”

“Who are you?”  “Call me Angelina.

The Testaments, both New and Old,

Divided all of Heaven’s fold

And turned the place to an arena.

The Father argued with the Son

That sex was wrong. But Jesus won.”

3

“So you’re an angel?” “Newly landed.

And Earth is such a lovely place . . .

I wouldn’t care if I were stranded.

Of course, I’m not.  In any case,

Can we engage in fornication?

I promise there’ll be no creation.”

“Why not?” I asked. “So you want kids?

I’m older than the pyramids;

And couldn’t stand to see them dying.”

“But what about our immortality?”

“When humans die, they’re really dead.

We traded sex to flee that dread.

Now please indulge my sexuality.”

So fucking till her time to go,

They dragged her screaming from death row.

ASTEROID 2005 YU55

When Earth had had its first encounter

With asteroid YU55,

It quickly took a body count. Her,

The Earth, had grown to be a hive.

It noticed, too, all man’s oppression

To fellow humans. Their aggression

Would soon destroy the planet Earth

And turn the bountiful to dearth.

Too late to make a course correction,

It thought about what it should do

To folks who didn’t have a clue.

Then thought it would make a connection.

“When I flyby again I’ll whack

Them good. Don’t worry. I’ll be back.”

GOD’S VIEW ON SANTORUM’S VIEWS ON SEX

When God heard candidate Santorum

Pronouncing what he thought of sex,

He gathered all the saints in forum

Who voted it to be Brand X.

One said his wife was so migraial,

It calmed her when they did it anal;

Another said that he was gay

And he, too, used that passageway;

Another said that masturbation

Was what she really liked to do.

God thought and said, “He has no clue.

That pleasure’s for ejaculation.

Why does he think I gave them holes?

To use with all their hearts and souls.”

GOD’S MESSIN’ WITH YA, HERM

Herm prayed to God said, My Lord, he

Was questioning if he should run?

And God, who was a little bored, He

Bethought Himself to have some fun.

“So Pizza Man beseeches favor

To be the GOP’s flag-waver.

They, all of them, are second-rate;

Not fit to guide a ship of state.”

But God said, “Yes. When you’re debating

The moderator will ask you

As president what would you do

If you caught your wife demonstrating

That marriage rights be had by gays.

And you will say, ‘I’d throw bouquets.’ ”

A SOLDIER’S DECLARATION OF WAR (FOR OCCUPY WALL STREET)

A soldier who was decorated

For killing of his country’s foes

Has ended being deprecated

For fighting back his country’s woes.

The shrinks told him he was a fighter

Who acted now as an outsider

By joining Occupy Wall Street

Which only argued for retreat.

The soldier said, “We were oppressors.

Those people didn’t do to me

What bankers did, the powers that be.

Wall Streeters are the real transgressors:

Because I couldn’t pay their loan,

They stripped my family to the bone.”

THE PROUD LIBERAL *

Observe the liberal after voting,

Contentment beaming on his face.

It’s hard to say he isn’t gloating

His liberty is based on race?

Although they would deny the knavery,

Their fortunes were derived from slavery:

A country built on coloreds’ backs

Of both the natives and the blacks.

The natives were exterminated;

The blacks, of course, lived on as slaves

Who found their freedom in their graves.

The Libs must be congratulated:

They built a land where rich whites bud

When planted in their victims’ blood.

* Liberalism is the reigning political ideology in the US whether it is expressed by the Republican or Democratic parties.

THE DEFINITION OF A LIBERAL

A “liberal” is one wants justice

For anyone is white and male;

And who demands, if others cussed us,

It is the last breath they inhale;

A white man who upholds black slavery;

And hangs the poor for their depravery;

Who thinks a woman is a bitch

Is meant to scratch his every itch;

Who has no feeling for the “other”

In places white men don’t control

Because the “other” has no soul;

Who rails and fights against Big Brother

Unless, of course, Big Brother’s white

And helps promote the “others” plight.

EDUCATION’S CATCH-22

The teacher was so busy testing

She’d very little time to teach;

And so was charged when manifesting

Her indignation with a screech.

Before the Board of Education

She let loose with her indignation

And claimed with testing paramount

She couldn’t teach the kids to count,

Do reading, writing, history, science.

Just what was she supposed to do

When taking tests was all they knew?

The Board of Ed said noncompliance

With policies that they desired

Left them no choice. The teacher’s fired.

Michele Bachmann Would Add . . . To Mount Rushmore?

Mt. Rushmore needs another model:

The face of Jesus on the Mount

While preaching to us at full throttle

About our mounting body count.

He’d say to us, “Your Christian nation

Has fallen into degradation

Participating in the wars

That your Almighty God abhors.

You would be better represented

By Satan for the Indians killed;

Or slaves and workers you've  treadmilled.

All these and more should be lamented.

A Christian nation helps the poor.

Ms. Bachmann you’re a certain boor.”

A STATEMENT BY ANONYMOUS ABOUT HERMAN CAIN

When Herm and I went out together

I asked his help to get me hired.

He took his hand and touched my nether

And said I’d get what I desired,

If I unzipped and sucked his penis

Then stuck it up my open Venus.

Well I was shocked and looked at Herm

And said you mean that little worm?

He shouted all you little bitches

Want something from me but won’t give

Enough to live and to let live.

And I replied with all your riches

There must be someway that you could

Be doctored so you could raise wood.

JUDGMENT DAY

I try to write with authenticity

About the world in which I live;

But cannot help my eccentricity

Of writing my rhymes with a shiv.

I’d slit the throats of politicians,

And preachers with their expositions

Of what it’s like to live in hell

Without a clue that’s where we dwell.

If rhyming verse proves insufficient

Especially in satire’s form

Then we will have to take by storm

These clods who mostly prove deficient;

Or else they’re lying. Come what may

We’ll slit their throats on Judgment Day.

ALIENS ON EARTH

The White House said on our home planet

No ET’s have as yet been found.

I beg to differ. If you’ll scan it

You’ll find that they’re preparing ground:

They’re organized. They're hale and hearty,

And call themselves the Grand Old Party.

They’d do away with all controls

Like dirtying our water holes;

And work promoting air pollution

And all the things that humans share,

While denigrating good health care.

The Democrats have no solution

Because they’re equally ET’s

Who, like The GOP, spread sleaze.

PROPOSAL FOR TEACHING SEX EDUCATION

In US schools, sex education

Should only be taught by the pros;

So I suggest those whose vocation

Is making porno videos.

Especially the female actors

Who can discuss familiar factors

Like how a girl slacks her crevasse

So she can take it up the ass.    

The age of virtual reality

Demands no less for kids watch porn

In which the male with his longhorn

Could easily cause some fatality.

Then all of those who pass the test

Appear in movies as a guest.

BLESS ME, FATHER, FOR I HAVE SINNED

The men behind the war on women

Are Catholic bishops.  That’s not news.

The Bible says it was Eve’s sinnin’

That brought this on: no right to choose.

Of course it’s not a sin suffusing

Their priestly semen when it’s oozing

Into the holes of little kids

For all know priests have outlaw ids.

But when they argue that abortion

Is sinning, what of their pastimes?

They’ll rank in Hell the worst of crimes.

Abortion though gives them a chance

Of dodging victims in knee pants.