Sunday, April 1, 2007



We have become a NASCAR NATION
Not only lacking fashion sense
But with almighty affirmation
That liberals aren't worth two cents.
It's true they don't play gladiator,
As do the Knights of Carburetor;
True, too, that most of them would gag
At seeing a Confederate flag;
But these are only minor quibbles;
For liberals, too, can play the lout
When GAYS and LESBIANS come-out
For marriage, taking little nibbles
From out the Democratic vote
And ruining their good cloth coat;


Or what about their blaming Nader
For stealing the election from
Al Gore who surely was the nadir
Of boredom. Too bad Clinton's cum
Spilled out Lewinsky's mouth and wandered
On to her dress where it was squandered.
For if Al Gore had Clinton's balls
He wouldn't have made obscene calls
Which surely cost him his his election:
By distancing a close campaign
From what he saw as Clinton's stain,
He missed his chance at fuel injection-
For good old boys in politics
Will always vote the biggest dicks;


And what of W's seduction
Of liberals to vote his war
Against weapons of mass destruction
To find it was Sadam's decor-
The way that he'd pimped out his palace-
That made George want to root canal us
But voted for it anyway,
As worth some thousands DOA.
Now liberals have moved dead center
And play confused hermaphrodite
Who can't decide for fight or flight,
To own it or to be a renter
Till they've elected the FIRST MATE
Who'll finally sink the SHIP OF STATE;


For Hillary seems twice as driven
To Captain on the SHIP OF STATE
As Bill was for it seems God-given
A woman shall remain FIRST MATE
In an American election
For President. A vivisection
By any blogger who would press
Should catch her though in her b.s.-
Like granting MAD GEORGE legislation
To take his armies to Iraq.
Although she now plays chicken hawk
In her attempt at nomination,
She must admit that she was played
At finding it no panty raid;


And what about their canon bashing,
As property of dead white males?
Who hasn't heard a prof tonguelashing
His students on the holy grails
Of literature he finds apalling,
As if the Bard of Avon's calling-
The drama of his dialogues-
Is outperformed by monologues
Of a vagina, when the writer
Knows Shakespeare every bit as well
As does the prof who's raising hell?
Eve shouldn't think I'm trying to slight her;
But stories, as showed Northrop Frye,
Have naught to do with "he's a guy;"


And what about their praising Jesus,
As Sundays they go off to church?
Is this meant somehow to appease us,
As they advance weapons research;
Or when they have their ordained clergy
Say "God bless" to their metallurgy
Thus making sure it's fit to kill
The Sermon on the Mount's goodwill?
For liberals are like Dick Cheney-
Though liberals will prove a prude
To Cheney who's just downright crude-
Or even like High priest Khomeini:
Down on their knees, they go hard-core
And pray their God's success in WAR;


And what about their claim as "racist"
Intolerance for those who'd show
That ISLAM is one of the basest
Religions when it goes gung ho
Against their womens' genitalia,
As so much useless paraphernalia;
Or'd gladly turn the gays and Jews
Into new leather for their shoes?
They claim we must be multicultural
And tolerant of all who would
Seek God. They are misunderstood:
For peoples who, once agricultural,
(Which means most voters in red states)
Must be allowed their culture's traits;


Or those who welcome immigration
From Mexico or anywhere
So long as it drains aspiration
From making their home countries fair;
Who'll cross a desert or die trying
In hopes that they'll soon be applying
For Wal Mart wages(or much less)
To be sent home relieving stress.
Meanwhike their countries are still bestial
Since no one's left to help combat
The capitalists or help format-
If not conditions flat celestial-
At least a country with a soul
Where laborers are in control


Of surpluses they can't help making,
As MARX showed us too long ago,
Although it is called profit takiing
And helps prop up the status quo.
Imagine workers, who'd die trying
To cross a desert, codifying
That after they'd paid all their dues
The rest was theirs. This won't amuse
The liberals or conservatives
Who'd use their media to profess
That workers make an awful mess
Of using "profits." Their curatives,
They'd say, are downright communist
(Which might make MARX think he'd been kissed).


And what about the missionaries
U.S. religion sends to scout
Other religions' sanctuaries
Certain their peoples will reroute
Their own beliefs into the Bible
So Jesus Christ won't hold them liable
For sins they didn't have the wit
To realize would make God shit;
Thus sending them to Hell's damnation?
And when they get run out of town
Or when their circus tents burn down,
They argue that Christianization
Must start all over from square one
And, so, call in a bombing run.


For Christians and the military
Have always gone like hand and glove.
The reason this is necessary
Is helping "natives" rise above
Their indigenous superstition,
Requires some heavy ammunition
Beyond the skills of any priest.
So to ensure they are released,
They'll sometimes use force that's excessive.
Voila! The military's roles
In fertilizing native souls.
For if your God is not aggressive,
Refusing killing now and then,
You'll never raise a born again.


And what about our " self-reliance "
Which underpins the " DREAM COME TRUE ? "
This states there is a nonalliance
Between a person's derring-do
And any social reciprosity
As if the rich by their precocity
Have overcome all handicaps
By pulling on their own bootstraps.
To this peculiar egoism
They link an entity called " God "
Who mystically gave them the nod ;
But to ensure His favoritism
( Which guards them all against mistakes )
They call for more and more tax breaks ;

( to be continued )

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