Rick Perry found a hieroglyphic,
As he stepped in a men’s room stall.
He knew this was unscientific
And so he thought it folderol.
He, after all, had been to college,
Though mostly studied carnal knowledge,
But called a preacher anyway
So he could conference and they pray.
The preacher, from First Things Museum,
Said, “Rick, behold the word of God.”
To which the governor said, “ That’s odd.”
“No, Rick, it means you cannot flee Him.
It is a sign the Holy Ghost
Wants you to raze the Leftist Coast.”
Down on their knees, both men were praying
Outside the stall. The door was locked.
“You see the figure. It’s sashaying;
And how its tiny hands are locked
Around what is, no doubt, a penis
And chasing one of boy-like genus?
That is a sign that one is gay,
Which God forbids the USA.
It may be he’s a child molester
Though both of them are all undressed
And both of them are running west.
And God, dear Rick’s, a big investor
In your campaign so you should do . . .”
“When I’m elected, I’d love to.”